It was a dark and stormy night in Paris, as Agent Liberty Sprocket cycled silently down the Champs-Élysées on his vintage Raleigh 10-speed to the rendezvous point. He smoothly dismounted as he approached the obelisk at the center of the Place de la Concorde and cast a furtive surveying glance across the square. As Liberty Sprocket walked up to the massive obelisk, erected on the site of the infamous guillotine of the reign of terror, a thin figure in a long trench coat and wide-brimmed hat strode out of the swirling mist.
“Comrade Sprocket,” the mysterious figure said to him as she wheeled her Fuji fixed gear conversion to the base of the obelisk, “the Parisian section of the Bicycle Liberation Front is very grateful that you were able to make it here to aid us in our struggle. Especially in these difficult times – we know how dangerous it is to make it through the ring road defences.”
“Anything for our comrades, Comandante Presta. Do you have the action plans for tomorrow?”
“Yes, of course.” Presta turned the false lugging on her frame a quarter turn clockwise and popped open the hidden top tube compartment on her bicycle, taking out a rolled up sheet of seemingly blank paper. Liberty Sprocket took the paper from her hands, unrolled it and brushed a few drops of Tri-Flow chain lube across the sheet, activating the invisible ink on the page.
Liberty Sprocket quickly assessed the top secret plans contained in the document. “Excellent, Comandante. We’ll be ready to meet your forces at the rally point tomorrow at the appointed time. God speed. And remember, comrade: there will be no revolution without sexual revolution, and there will be no sexual revolution without bikesexual revolution.”
“Venceremos, Agent Sprocket!”
Back in the BLF safehouse, Liberty Sprocket went over the details of the plan more closely:
18H> 20H @ Nicolas Ehrahrt Cycles: Aperitif “grease and sawdust” with BIKE SMUT
20H> 21H: Sunset Bike Ride with the Paris Chill Racing
21H> As much you can @ Le Houla Oups: Screening of BIKE SMUT and performance in all genres with the TAD GIRLS SQUAD and surprise guests, plus your desires most ulterior.…
Donations welcome; we’re counting on you to support the Revolution!
Do we need to specify? Entry reserved for over 17 years.